the aftermath...part three
for part two, read 5:32:48
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i wobbled to the men in tuxedos, grabbed a tiffany box, and collapsed in the first available chair. get that damn chip timer off'a me!!
somehow i found my parents in the crowd. i was sore. and tired. and angry/frustrated/disappointed. but i was numb. i wasn't excited. having run a marathon was, at the time, the stupidest thing anyone could ever do ever in the history of mankind, and i hated it. stupid. stupid, stupid, stupid was all i could muster. i didn't want to be congratulated. i didn't want anyone to be "proud" of me... i certainly wasnt. the entire thing was ridiculous. I, was ridiculous.
slowly i calmed down, i hugged my parents and thanked them for being there. thank God they were there, i was a complete mess. i was walking in circles, talking jibberish. my dad tried to help me out by taking away the tiffany bag, and i clung to it like a child to her blankey.
the necklace. i want the necklace
i squatted down to my now preferred body position and pulled out the blue Tiffany box. it was just a necklace. but as i opened the little blue pouch, and tugged on the chain, the floodgates opened, my body quit fighting it, my mind let go of it and my emotions took over.
i cried. no.... i sobbed. my entire body shook as i held that necklace. that perfectly silver runner i held in my hand represented so much, and in a moment it all came rushing towards me. the training. all the months of dedication and sacrifice. everything about who i've become and the ride it's all been. my parents. my friends. everyone that gave something of themselves to me that helped me along the way. everyone that told me how proud of me they were.... everyone that knew i'd finish. when even i questioned my own strength.
i was overcome. and it felt so good not to hold all that in anymore.....
------
i wobbled to the men in tuxedos, grabbed a tiffany box, and collapsed in the first available chair. get that damn chip timer off'a me!!
somehow i found my parents in the crowd. i was sore. and tired. and angry/frustrated/disappointed. but i was numb. i wasn't excited. having run a marathon was, at the time, the stupidest thing anyone could ever do ever in the history of mankind, and i hated it. stupid. stupid, stupid, stupid was all i could muster. i didn't want to be congratulated. i didn't want anyone to be "proud" of me... i certainly wasnt. the entire thing was ridiculous. I, was ridiculous.
slowly i calmed down, i hugged my parents and thanked them for being there. thank God they were there, i was a complete mess. i was walking in circles, talking jibberish. my dad tried to help me out by taking away the tiffany bag, and i clung to it like a child to her blankey.
the necklace. i want the necklace
i squatted down to my now preferred body position and pulled out the blue Tiffany box. it was just a necklace. but as i opened the little blue pouch, and tugged on the chain, the floodgates opened, my body quit fighting it, my mind let go of it and my emotions took over.
i cried. no.... i sobbed. my entire body shook as i held that necklace. that perfectly silver runner i held in my hand represented so much, and in a moment it all came rushing towards me. the training. all the months of dedication and sacrifice. everything about who i've become and the ride it's all been. my parents. my friends. everyone that gave something of themselves to me that helped me along the way. everyone that told me how proud of me they were.... everyone that knew i'd finish. when even i questioned my own strength.
i was overcome. and it felt so good not to hold all that in anymore.....
posted by a.maria at 9:11 PM
25 Comments:
I know you don't know me, but I just wanted to say that I have so enjoyed following you in your journey to the finish line. Through all the training...all the pain...all the crazy saturday morning runs...you, my dear, are an endurance runner and have achieved something that the majority of all runners have yet to accomplish. And while the bruises and pain are only temporary, you will remember that flood of emotion forever and can proudly wear the necklace you so deserve.
I hope you'll continue to run and track your journey...no matter which race you choose next...
You're my hero.
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR TIME. YOUR TIME WAS BETTER THAN MY FIRST MARATHON IN 2000. TNT IS AN AWESOME GROUP TO RUN WITH. KEN IN ST LOUIS
Awwwww mate I have been following your journey all along and I am so proud of you, I was in tears reading this, you are a legend and never forget it
LBTEPA
Australia
What an awesome race report - totally right there with you the whole way. I'm so sorry you had such a rough time out there, but you know what? Your finishing time was awesome and your story of your adventure from starting as non-runner to finishing as a marathoner should be an inspiration for everybody!!!
Congrats, and keep it up!!!
OH. MY. GOD. Flatman says, "One of the best race reports ever written"! Holy cow. You really brought the emotions for this one. You have such perseverance. I am amazed with what you have done and can't wait to see what else you have inside of you! Thanks for sharing your journey.
What's on the horizon for the A.? Anything she wants!
YOU ARE A RUNNER!
You were awesome out there! I kept looking for you to pass me around that lake but never quite saw you. After the race, you looked like you felt great. I never would have guessed it had been the run you just described.
Congrats on a great run! And what an awesome report. Doesn't that little runner around your neck just represent so much!
Incredilbe. What an incredible, incredible report. I am so proud of you!
Damn, everyone beat me to it! So, I don't care if it's not original: YOU ARE AWESOME!!!
To run through that kind of pain?? HOW??? I lost count of how many places you were hurting--and to take time out to stretch and be stretched and to STILL make that time?? You must have really been bookin' it!! I'm taking 1/2 hour off your time for stretching. So you made 5 hours in my book! (not that it matters, your time still rocked.)
And in my book: you are a STAR. An INSPIRATION. A WONDER. and yes, a RUNNER.
And what a following you have developed! Just look at how many people were pulling for you, thinking of you, and are now totally impressed by your fortitude, grace, humor, and strength.
I'll be thinking of you the whole way.
Wow. That was really moving. Literally. ;) You did great! And you are a runner.
A! I'm dying over here. So sad to hear that the race was so painful. I hope that as the days and weeks go by, the feeling you had at the finish stands out more than the pain of your knees.
Everyone has probably told you what an accomplishmet completing your first marathon is. Try to remember that six months ago, you couldn't run three miles, and I caught you slip an "ONLY" in front of 13 in these posts.
As you could have guessed, I've been struggling with my running lately, and with what it means to be a runner. I've decided that good times don't make you a runner, nor do weekly mileages greater than 25. Runners stare down 26.2 miles (or 3, or 5, or 10, or 13.1...) and want to lace up their Asics, suck on some Gu, and get going.
And that's the type of person you are now. So enjoy 26 days of rest, lace up your shoes, and get going again. We're all rooting for you!
Wow, that was fantastic. Just wow.
Congratulations! What a race, and what a race report. I can so sympathize with the frustration and anger after finishing something that felt like it just shouldn't have been that hard, but it sounds like you smartened up quicker than I did.
Be proud! Enjoy your pretty, pretty necklace! (I'm jealous--it sounds much cooler than my medal. I don't care how many people crow about how exciting medals are--what are you supposed to do with the damn thing, anyway?)
You did it!! I'm so happy for you!! I'm sorry you had a hard time with your knee(s) :-/
way to go, girl!!!!!!!!! you freakin' rock! before you know it...you'll be asking when the next one is!
-jessica
congratulations! I'm a week behind on my blog reading but When I just read you last couple of posts, there was a lump in my throat :)
I'm so very impressed with you, Alejandra! It takes such courage and strength to tackle such a formidable task--and you did it, and you did it WELL...not to mention making us laugh and cry right there with you along the way. Thank you so much for sharing your story.
Will you continue to blog? You have an expectant audience now, you may have noticed, and we wait with bated breath to hear what's next for you!
I've been offline a couple of days, so I'm going through all this after the fact...
wow. quite a report. i really felt your pain through the latter half of the race. but then, i also felt the emotion at the finish, looking at the necklace. your writing really pulled me in...
i'm so happy for you. i understand your moments of not wanting to be congratulated. of expecting to just sail through this thing. well you know what? it's pretty "effing" hard to run a marathon. and you did it. and in a month from now, when the pain is only a memory, you'll have run a marathon. and in a year from now when you can't even remember the pain, you'll have run a marathon. so be proud.
congratulations on an amazing achievement.
Congratulations on your first marathon, and hopefully it will be one of many.
Just as hearing "You're almost there" doesn't make anyone feel any better, the notion that many other runners, including myself, had painful and disappointing first marathons probably won't mean much. Yet as painful as my first one was, the very next morning I was itching to run another one if only to prove that I can run it better and faster. This Sunday I did. I still cramped up, but I was stronger and smarter about it and beat my time by over half an hour. Wow, I wish I had come across your blog earlier. It really is a great one.
Best of luck, and, again, congratulations. You kicked ass.
Raul
Congratulations! That was a helluva race you ran! And a great report. Talk about perseverance.
The Nike Women's Marathon is on my wish list, because I want the Tiffany's necklace! You make me feel like I know what I'll be getting into (although I wouldn't be as fast as you.) Good job.
Thanks so much for posting the whole story. I think I felt the same way throughout my marathon on Sunday. It was great to finally do it, but so painful emotionally and physically, and I felt like you did after how everything went down.
I'm feeling better now that it is a few days gone, and I've had time to let it out.
Hope you are doing better today.
hey girl
what a lovely, emotional post.
i too am jealous of the necklace.
and feel so happy for you and how this marathon journey touched you in so many positive ways.
sometimes i think, how could i ever not have had running in my life? how can others not have running in their lives?
THIS is too cool. Look at you! You made it and lived to tell the tale, and what a tale. You earned it hermanita, felicidades otra vez :)
I had a break at work and decided to read your marathon report from a few years back and WOW. WOW. Wow. what determination. Wow. Did I say Wow? Unbelievable. That whole race report is like a book, a movie. Somebody should pay for the movie rights. I'm sure since you've now moved to Austin, there will be more marathons in your future. Take care.
Hi, I stumbled upon your blog from BTT and read this story. WOW! Very inspirational. I have been toying with eventually training for a marathon(maybe a yr from now)and this has totally inspired me to do it. It helps seeing how people pull through their struggles and come out great.
i can't remember how i actually found your blog, but i figured i'd comment since i'm here. anyway, this is such a great story :) let me know if you ever need a running partner for a race - you sound like you'd be a blast :)
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